Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Oversight

I just realized I never posted anything yesterday, which means I must have actually been working while I was at work. Go figure. To remedy this inadvertant laxity, I will now post some stupid shit I've done at other times when I should have been working:

SSSSSSEQUELS!

Snakes On A Crane: In this action-packed sequel to the blockbuster hit, deadly snakes attack a construction site.
Snakes On A Lane: A local bowling alley is terrorized by deadly snakes. The tagline: "This Summer...They Will STRIKE!"
Snakes On David Blaine: Wherein all the deadly snakes DISAPPEAR!
Snakes In The Rain: A charming musical featuring deadly snakes.
Snakes In Disdain: Deadly snakes terrorize the Brooklyn neighborhoods of Williamsburg and Greenpoint.

POSSIBLE FOLLOW-UPS TO KATY PERRY'S SMASH HIT SINGLE "I KISSED A GIRL (AND I LIKED IT)"
"I Downloaded That New Radiohead Album (And I Liked It)"
"I Leased A Toyota Camry (And I Liked It)"
"I Went Parasailing In Key West (And I Liked It)"
"My Mom Bought Me An Emerald Bracelet For My Birthday (And I Thought It Was Pretty)"
"I Saw The New Coen Brothers Movie (But I Found It Disappointing)"
"I Kissed Another Girl (And I Still Liked It [But Not As Much As The First One])"
"I Tried That New Sushi Place On 34th And Madison (It Wasn't Bad)"

10 comments:

  1. I have only one common denominator for this:

    I hate snakes, and I hate Sushi.
    Sushi slices look exactly like a sliced snake.
    And that disgusting perfumed pinkish jellyfish?
    UGH!

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  2. I noticed you didn't post anything yesterday (and I didn't like it. Not one bit)

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  3. TCHC
    Becca's highly addictive!

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  4. @TCHC: LOL! I should have added that one to the list. :D

    @Dalia: You know it. Let's hope it works on a certain boy... ;)

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  5. It will, if you have the chance to repeat the dose! >:(

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  6. @Dalia: This Sunday. ;)

    Also, sushi: I went to a Japanese restaurant with some friends a while ago and told them I had never tried sushi, so they ordered me some. I took one bite, and asked for a bowl of plain white rice instead. I'm just not that hip. *sigh*

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  7. Me dance Apache now
    yes, yes, yes!

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  8. SUSHI -
    A genius way to sell tasteless sticky rice with a fishy flavor to dumb white people, make them pay a lot of money for that, and feel trendy about it.

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  9. @Dalia: Yes! I love the Apache dance! :D

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  10. I.Hate.Sushi. I don't get it. And I'm really cool. Join my really cool Sushi Sucks Club. We'll get t-shirts.

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